Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
I'm both gender and math confused
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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