When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
