I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
