idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Randomize
