Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
