Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
