You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
