oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
this just has baby written all over it
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Randomize
