I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Randomize
