Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
