everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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