Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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