when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Randomize