Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Randomize