even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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