I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
