whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Randomize
