i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Randomize
