just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
