Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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