Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Randomize
