My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
