I will die if light touches me.
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
