Do you still have your period?
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Randomize