At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
