I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
