The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
