He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
