Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Randomize
