this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
I woke up under a house in Key West
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Randomize
