Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
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