So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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