ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
