This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
