id be glad to
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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