similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Randomize
