It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
