Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
