if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
