is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Randomize