do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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