Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
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