East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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