I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
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