Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
