ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
