Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
