So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
