so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize
