My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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